Glimpse of a God
by eprime
Summary: Teddy has grown up on stories and rumors of the past. He takes a chance to find out the truth for himself. Timetravel. Written for teddy fest.  Pairing: Sirius/Teddy, hints of Sirius/Remus


They were in a long forgotten room in the tower that appeared to once have been a sitting room of some sort, perhaps last inhabited during the Founders Era given the antiquity of the furnishings and the spindle in the corner, looking like theyd come straight out of the book of Muggle fairytales his grandfather had given to Teddy's mum when she was a child and his Gram had given to him in turn. It was strangely appropriate with the moon streaming through the open window, illuminating their bodies which were laid out on spread cloaks covering the stone floor. Fitting, because the boy-almost a man-thrusting into him slow and deep was like a character from one of those tales. A legend.

He even looked the part with his pale skin and dark hair and masculine beauty that didn't seem real in the shadows and light of candle and moon. Teddy didn't look like anyone. He was the shape shifter in the tale and could only look like anybody but himself.

_Am I really here?_, he wondered until the hazy burn of pleasure between them turned sharp and focused, and they tangled together in a winded, sweaty pile. Sirius didn't seem to mind the sticky mess gluing them together because he propped up just enough to kiss Teddy the way he couldn't before, sliding his tongue inside Teddy's mouth slow and deep and drawing Teddy's into his mouth with an indolent slick and slide.

He made a sound of protest when Sirius pulled away, not only because the kiss made his body hum but also because now Sirius would be able to speak, to ask questions like he always did. But Sirius only darted his head down and captured Teddy's bottom lip between his teeth, grinning a little around the bite and flicking his tongue out to tease the trapped flesh. He pulled away slowly, letting Teddy's lip scrape through and escape the hold. Then it began.

"Who are you?"

"Teddy."

"Who are you, _really_?"

"Does it matter?"

"Yes, of course it matters."

"Not enough for you to have any qualms about fucking me." Teddy allowed himself to smirk.

"Why did you come here? Why now?"

"I already told you. It was a lark that's all. I had the means, so..." He shrugged one shoulder and schooled his expression into mild amusement.

"I don't believe you."

"You keep asking for answers I can't give you."

"How long are you staying?"

Teddy frowned. He didn't want to think about the answer to that. "I don't know. Not long." The truth was he'd already stayed well over the time he'd originally allotted himself. He'd meant to be quite strict about it, but nothing had turned out like he'd expected, and it was becoming increasingly difficult to be discreet. He understood a little better now about the warnings in the texts he'd researched, but he had found out all too well that knowing the dangers of a situation didn't much affect the way things actually played out.

"Teddy," Sirius murmured, bending his head to place soft, wet kisses down the side of Teddy's throat. "I just want to know you better." That was a lie. Sirius wanted to know everything, had been trying since Teddy first appeared. Sometimes Teddy wondered if their whole seduction stemmed only from his desire to know. "Give me _something_."

They all had been trying in their own ways, really: Sirius, James, his father, and even Peter. Peter was the easiest to shrug off though he was almost as persistent as Sirius. He noticed things, paid closer attention than anyone to nuances the others overlooked, and Teddy had to be extra careful not to slip up when Peter was around. If he hadn't known who and what Peter was already, he probably wouldn't have noticed the stealthy skill he had to fade into the background and ferret out secrets without letting on. But Peter could also sense that Teddy disliked him and he wavered between a passive belligerence and ingratiating fawning that served to create an effective barrier most of the time.

Teddy thought perhaps he had the most trouble with James because he kept confusing him with Harry. They looked so much alike, even if they were very different in most other ways, and Teddy loved Harry. It was easy to forget to watch himself with James. He couldn't help trusting him, even though he knew better than to spill his secrets. James never pressed him as much as the others anyway, only enough to satisfy himself that Teddy meant no harm.

His father-no. Teddy wouldn't think of him now, not while he was here with Sirius like this, and guilt and jealousy already hovered at the edges of his thoughts. Mouth at his ear now, Sirius sighed. "You know us, don't you? This wasn't random. Just tell me who you are. How you know us. That can't hurt anything, can it?"

"It depends on how you look at it, doesn't it?" Teddy wound his fingers in Sirius' hair and pulled his face up where he could see his eyes. "Knowing wouldn't change anything. Not the _outcome_ of anything. It couldn't because that's not how this works. But it could change _you_. What you feel. What you understand. What you see. Who's to say you'd like that?"

Sirius was silent for a moment, slipping his tongue out to wet his lips as he stared down at Teddy.

"For example," Teddy said softly. "If I could tell you the day you'd die, and I'm not saying I can, would you want to know?"

"I..."

Daringly, Teddy went on. "What if...what if I was your son and came back to see what you were like at my age. Would you really want to know that? Wouldn't you be tempted to ask when and how and with whom? Where would it stop? Not to mention the fact that we've just been-"

Sirius' eyes go amusingly wide. "You're _not_..."

Teddy waited just long enough for the horrified expression to bloom across Sirius' face before he laughed. "No."

Sirius dropped his head against Teddy's shoulder. "That was not fucking funny." He gave Teddy a sharp bite to the shoulder. "Arsehole."

"So you see, it's not so simple. It's better I don't tell you anything."

"You could always tell me, then Obliviate me after." Sirius looked as if he was only half joking.

"Not completely reliable, even with trained Obliviators." Teddy's lips twisted. "You'd risk having Merlin knows how many holes poked in your mind by _my_ amateur go at it?"

The sulky yet stubborn look on Sirius' face startled him even as it made Teddy laugh. He'd seen the same expression on his own face and now he understood why his Gram had always told him he looked just like a Black when he wore it. His smile faltered a little. The fact that they weren't all that distantly related was a rather disturbing thought to be having now given their current position.

"But there _is_ something to tell," Sirius insisted.

"Of course there is."

"But, I mean, you did come to see _us_, didn't you? Specifically. One of us? All of us? _Why_?"

"Sirius." Teddy sighed. "Stop pushing."

"No." Sirius pushed up to his knees, straddling Teddy. "I have to know. Did something happen? Something bad? Only, I figure why come if you could talk to us whenever you're from. And it can't be too long in the future because that wouldn't make sense. So we, one of us at least, must have-"

"Stop it! You don't know what you're talking about." He tried to roll Sirius off so he could sit up. Sirius obliged, not taking his eyes off Teddy. "Fuck, this was such a bad idea." Teddy didn't know if he meant coming here at all or this thing with Sirius he had let take on a life of its own. He wasn't sure he understood _any_ of his own motivations anymore.

"Tell me why, then."

"I can't explain!" The almost full moon was shining between them and Teddy turned away from its pale light, curling his knees up and letting his hair fall against his face. "I can't, all right? I just wanted to! I needed to!"

"Teddy..."

"Why are you doing _this_?" Teddy's hand drew a jerky arc between the two of them. "Us. _Me_?"

He made himself look at Sirius again, wanting to see the expression on his face. Sirius looked taken aback; uncertain and young and a little afraid.

"You don't know me at all." It was the truth, and Teddy forced himself to confront it. What's more, Sirius could never know. "So why did you want me to begin with?"

"I don't know," Sirius said slowly. "I think I...when I saw you watching me-_how_ you watched me-that's when I..."

"So you wanted me because I wanted you?"

"No. I..." Sirius frowned down at the floor. "It wasn't like that. Not just that. I watched you, too, and well..." His eyes flicked up to Teddy's face. "You reminded me a bit of...of someone. I'm not sure exactly how. Not the way you look, just..."

Teddy closed his eyes even though the words weren't a shock at all. George and Bill had obviously known what they were on about. Harry's more oblique references and looks of concern had given him fair warning. And because he'd been looking for it, he'd confirmed everything for himself soon enough after he got here, even if no one else in all of Hogwarts had figured it out, including his father and Sirius. It wasn't a shock, and yet he felt hollowed out, and he couldn't even explain it to himself.

He found himself thinking of his mother. God, she was just a little kid now, practically a baby. And his father, Remus fucking Lupin, who had been just as kind and intelligent as everyone had always said, and agreeably mischievous and devious, at which only a few people had hinted. Professor McGonagall had been the most surprising source of information when it came to that.

He had taken to Teddy, though warily, and under his quiet acceptance, a contrast to the boisterous approval of the others, Teddy had seen him evaluating and analyzing and probably coming up with scarily accurate theories. He was the only one who didn't ask the obvious questions or many at all, but he came up with the deceptively innocuous ones. There was something well hidden inside him that seemed almost ruthless, gave him a core of steel, and Teddy wondered if it was the wolf or just his dad, or if the difference even existed.

And he filled Teddy with such an amorphous yet livid anger sometimes that his hands curled up into fists when he came into the room. He wanted to hit him and hate him and love him and drag him back with him and never leave him. He wanted to take what was his and make it his own and never give it back.

"Teddy." Sirius touched Teddy tentatively. "I _do_ like you. I feel like I do know you somehow. It's not just..."

Without warning, Teddy uncurled and lunged forward, knocking Sirius back to the floor with a hot desperate kiss that left them both panting. "Shut up," he muttered. "Shut up."

Sirius' fingers dug into his shoulders and Teddy moaned into his mouth before he wrenched away almost violently.

"I'll tell you one secret. Just one. All right?"

Paradox meant he couldn't really change anything, Teddy reminded himself. It had to have happened this way or it wouldn't have happened at all. Sirius was watching him with wide, stunned eyes as he nodded. Slowly, Teddy leaned down and whispered in Sirius' ear.

"Remus fancies me?" The mixture of disbelief and hope in Sirius' voice made Teddy's chest go tight.

"I'm going back tonight. Now." Teddy got up, pulling his clothes on hastily without bothering to clean up first.

"Wait!" Sirius sat up, reaching for him.

Teddy stepped out of reach. "No. I have to go now."

"But you can't just-"

"Tell James...tell James that his son will have green eyes."

Sirius' mouth fell open in shock, and Teddy stared down at him, mouth curling up at the corner.

"Tell Remus you love him."

From the pocket of the robe, Teddy drew the time turner and placed the chain around his neck.

"And pass this on to Peter from me."

Between the vee of his two-fingered salute, Teddy watched Sirius' face soften into startled laughter before the world began to waver.


End file.
